Awkward

I had an opportunity to spend the summer I was sixteen with some family friends, who were stationed on Pearl Harbor in Honolulu. They had a daughter Dotty who was twenty, and we were an interesting pair because she was barely 5' and I was over 5'9".

We went around everywhere together when she wasn't working--and I mean everywhere. In Hawaii you can drink at twenty. Being short, she was always carded. Being tall, I was never carded. Made life simple, especially since I'm not a drinker and wasn't doing anything to get me in trouble (except being in a place where drinking was happening).

One day we were on a double date, and Dotty's guy wanted to go to Tripler Army Medical Center to visit a friend. It was a beautiful Saturday morning, so we were all game. I regularly dated a sailor who happened to be 6'5". He didn't have a car. Dotty did--a Toyota Corolla, two door. Since it was her car, she drove. Obviously my date and I sat in the back seat. So picture my date as he sat in the back seat of this tiny, foreign car with his knees around his ears.

First mistake:

I was in a dress. A short dress. It hadn't been a problem in the past because I'd sit up front with Dotty. But I knew I was in trouble as soon I had to get into the back seat of that itty bitty car. I made it in without flashing but knew there was no way I could get out the same way. With my mind furiously working, I came up with what I was sure would be the perfect solution. My date got out first and came around to hold the door open for me, while Dotty stood behind and to the side watching through the front door car window.

Second mistake:

Gracefully, I turned around and sat on the folded down front driver's seat. See, the plan was to lift my feet from the back seat floor and set them demurely on the asphalt, maintaining my modestly.

Yeah, well life happens while we're making other plans.

What I hadn't counted on was the angry teenaged god of humiliation directing his evil eye right at me. (That's my story anyway, and I'm sticking to it.) As I sat so gracefully sat on the folded seat, it began to tilt and my bum began to slide ... right out the door and onto the hot asphalt. In desperation I tried to swing my feet out to catch myself but, alas, my sandles got caught and my feet went nowhere.

Sitting on the ground, clinging to my skirt, I screamed at Dotty to help me. She and my date, who had been momentarily stunned, immediately burst out laughing. Of course Dotty's date had to see what had happened, and he charged around the car to join the chorus of my mockers.

Fat lot of help they were.

A dismal day.

How about you? Ever been completely embarrassed?